Ahh, love it. Now's the time to get a bit of your own back for the massive poo on your white linen trousers at your very first mothers group, or that day spent (unsuspectingly) with vomit matting up the end of the hair behind your shoulder, and of course we can't forget the old "mummy has that lady got a big baby in her tummy? [no, just lots of cheeseburgers]" severe embarrassment in the crowded lift.
The first EYK101 plan I've had brewing since my breastfeeding days. I am president of the Itty Bitty Titty Committee, and am expecting full assault from two teenage boys and one little sister who copies their all when the time comes to tease your poor mother about such things. My response will be: Firstly to wait til there are as many of their spotty friends congregated, and secondly to cup my itty bitty's and announce, with jiggling motion, "These made 10 kilo's of each one my children, you know". Ohh, I can't wait.
And now we've entered school, the games we can play mummy ducks. The "GIVE MUMMY A KISS GOODBYE SCHMOOCKY POOCKY" in the middle of a full capacity playground is standard procedure to be employed any time after their first term of school for the rest of their 13 years.
Yesterday I stumbled upon a good one to add to our list, by sheer, delightful accident. I put a little note in Cool School Dude's lunch box, with words he has shown me he knows from his new journey of learning to read. However, he seemed to have - unfortunately for him - forgotten what the words were so asked his teacher for a bit of help. She kindly announced, in the presence of the whole class having lunch: "It says 'Love you'", then also apparently turned around and told all the teachers on playground duty too!
All other lessons for the greater good of our children, would be gratefully received...