Goodbye to the last one.

Our little Miss had her “interview” for preschool today, she’s due to start next year. I am sad.

It feels like I’m letting go of all my children, all at once, with her, the last, taking that first step away. Right now I know everything she does, everywhere she goes, who she talks to, who she yells at and who she cuddles.

I have full faith in the preschool she’s going to, they’re about as caring as I think one could get in that environment. I have no qualms that her preschool teachers aim to raise their class just as we try to as parents at home – with the right amount of strictness, inspiration and, most importantly, caring.

And boy, at the moment, I could probably do with the space because are our kids driving me c-razy! The noise… urgh….and she’s the noisiest of them all!  But I usually relish the chaos kid’s cause. So I still don’t want her to go.

I’m frightened of the silent space which will greet me when I come home alone. Getting in the car alone. Doing the food shopping with no one in the trolley seat to giggle with…. even though I might actually get some of the things that are on my list this way.

I’m not so good with ‘me time’, I like to be busy, and a 2 year old certainly fills that need. I will work, but it’s ‘from home’ work, which will be in that empty silent space, by my empty silent self.

I know it’s not ground breaking stuff, every mother’s gone through it, and their life has gone on – nay, they say they even enjoy it! So I will think of all you mums: How you can now go and help in reading groups with your other kids at school, how you can get your hair done in longer than 10 minutes whilst shovelling food into someone trying to climb out of the trolley. I can’t think of anything else, but I’m sure there are tonnes of things I’ll be able to do.

After I’ve cried a bit.

1 comment:

  1. I've shed a tear, Felic.
    To ease the "pain",ask your Mum about weekly ladies tennis groups. At least you can all cry on each others shoulders then.
    Love you,